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HOMEFRONT: A mom’s role changes through the years

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By Alma Gaul | Friday, May 16, 2008 |

Last week, I read a set of quotes about mothers, all appropriate for newspaper use on Mother’s Day.

One that struck me, by author Elia Parsons, was: “Nothing else will ever make you as happy or as sad, as proud or as tired, as motherhood.”

That doesn’t say it all, but it says a lot.

When our children are babies, we look at them when they cry and wish that they were able to tell us what they want so we could fix it.

Then they get older and they do tell us. But sometimes what they want and what they need are different things, so we try to guide them with our words, but mostly with our actions, toward what we think they need. We try to nurture roots. We send them to school, take them to church, eat picnics in the woods.

Then they get older still, and once again they don’t tell us what they want because we are not the ones that can fix it anyway.

When they are in the “wings” stage, what they want and need is outside our purview. What they want and need, they have to get from the larger world, from their work and school, and in their relationships with their peers.

All we can do is hope the roots are sufficient, cheer them on, stand ready to help if needed, and worry.

Not that the latter does any good, but it’s what makes every day Mother’s Day for me.

Happy day to all.

In praise of picnics

… Speaking of picnics, a couple of years ago, one of my co-workers here asked, “Do people still go on picnics?”

And I thought, “What kind of a fool question is that?”

To me, that was like asking, “Do people still tie their shoes?” But as I thought about what she said, I realized that perhaps I am in the minority on this.

In my mind, there are few sights more compelling than an empty picnic table set under a shade tree or along a riverbank. Plunk down a tablecloth and a cooler, and the table and immediate surroundings become all our own, our own little piece of park, staked out for just us.

You can share food, conversation and nature all in one fell swoop. What could be better? I recommend it.

Alma Gaul can be contacted at (563) 383-2324 or agaul@qctimes.com. Comment on this column at qctimes.com.